Kaboutjie SA Mommy Blogs by Lynne Huysamen
Over the last decade teenagers across the world have been exposed not only to traditional tactics of bullying in real life, but also the added layer of cyber bullying with the advent of social media. The effects of bullying are varied and can harm the victim’s emotional well-being, self-esteem, reputation and in some cases, their bodies. Teenagers often feel isolated, alone, and scared, as if there’s no way out.
According to the *National Center for Education Statistics, girls are three times more likely to be cyber bullied than boys. While boys are prone to physical bullying, girls are more inclined to relational bullying. This means that girls are more likely to exclude others from activities, social circles and spreading rumours to improve their social standing and control others. This form of bullying is subtle and can go on unnoticed for a long time.
Despina Senatore, author of Soar!, the guidebook that seeks to help teen girls navigate the turbulent waters of puberty prepares them to deal with adolescence through practical examples and resources; mindfulness exercises and exposing them to a myriad of potential careers to keep their eyes on the future and work towards the women they want to become.
“It’s important to make your teen girls aware of cyber bullying and equip them to deal with it if needed. Things have changed since we were children and our kids are bullied in invisible ways that can leave them despondent, depressed or suffering from anxiety,” says Senatore.
Below are some tips to help your teen girl cope:
It’s not you, it’s them
Most bullies pick on others because they are often unhappy with themselves and are trying to hide their own fears and insecurities. Even though it’s not a comfort at the time, your teen girl should remember being bullied is not her fault nor is there something wrong with her.
Tell someone
If she’s getting bullied, she should confide in a trusted adult. Sharing will help her feel less alone and scared; and an adult can help her to report the bullying.
Social media security settings are important
She should keep her passwords safe and not share them with anyone. Tighten up security settings to make sure that only her friends can engage with her content. Likes on social media posts aren’t the be all and end all. She should never share personal information like her phone number or email address to social media.
Keep a record
If someone is cyberbullying her, she should take screenshots and keep it in a safe place. This will come in handy if she wants to report the bullying.
Don’t respond or retaliate
It’s tempting to want to respond, but the best thing is not to. Bullies often want a reaction from their victims and will leave them deflated if they don’t get any.
Block the bullies
There’s no shame in blocking anyone on social media or WhatsApp if they are sending hurtful messages.
Report the bullies
All social media sites have policies against abuse and victims can report abusive accounts directly to the sites.
Stay off anonymous sites
Teenagers should stay away from anonymous websites. It’s a paradise for bullies because they can hide.
Purchase your copy of Soar! at https://purposefulwoman.co.za/online/ for R150 (excl. delivery) or if you are a LO teacher or Career councillor reach out to Despina on her website https://www.purposefulwoman.co.za/ to discuss how Soar! can be incorporated into your lesson plans.
*https://ies.ed.gov/blogs/nces/post/new-data-show-growth-in-online-bullying
About Despina Senatore
Senatore is the founder and owner of Purposeful Woman, an organisation established out of her passion for people development and more so in assisting women to find their true potential. Purposeful Woman focus on services such as executive coaching, workshops on imposter syndrome and personal development; and Nancy Kline’s Time to Think workshops for corporates wishing to improve team dynamics and effectiveness.
Great tips, bullying is so common nowadays
This is one topic i fear for my daughter when she’s older. Social media has turned into a mess and our children end up as victims. Thank you for the great tips
Luckily my children did not go through it.people are using social media as a platform for scamming. Parents must make sure to check their kids’ conversations to be able to safeguard them.
Parents must always be aware and vigilant.
I have a friend who is being cyber bullied subliminally by people she calls her friends, it’s sad because she lives to please people , honestly not giving a reaction is a boss move and keeping in your head ‘it’s not you it’s them’ is a great start for her ❤️.
Thank you this is insightful and helpful.
Having a child who’s in their teens this truly comes in handy and it’s actually educates our kids on how they should handle themselves
A very interesting article to learn a lot from it. Thank you for this information
A very helpful article. Cyber bullying is a real problem and may kids are suffering because of it. It helps as parents to know what and who our kids are talking to on the internet and help them through any problem they may encounter.