Kaboutjie SA Mommy Blogs by Lynne Huysamen
It has been just over a year since I wrote the blog on my daughter’s first potty achievement. I always assumed potty training was faster. I suppose it is all about the method you choose to use. When posting on my facebook page on this topic a lot of moms said it took a week or two for their child to be fully potty trained. It has taken us over a year and she is still on nappies at night.
I chose to let my daughter take the lead and move at her own pace instead of pressuring her. It has worked well for us so far and has been relatively painless. She will be 3 years old in 2 months and has “trained” herself almost on her own. We have had a few small setbacks along the way but nothing major.
The only thing I actively did for my daughter was in the beginning to invite her with me to the toilet and then I told her what I was doing and she was very interested. I bought her a potty and suggested she sit on it and “use it” while I was on the toilet. She found this very entertaining and sat on the potty fully clothed while I went to the toilet. Click here to read the beginning of this journey.
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Over the last year she has decided when she wants to wear panties and when she wants to wear a nappy. Over time she progressed to wearing panties at home and then I would only put a nappy on her for trips out and for sleeping. The day care was really helpful and worked with me on the potty training which really helped a lot.
One of the few setbacks we had was one occasion at home which I found very upsetting. She had an accident on the floor and a family member told her she was naughty and if she does it again she must go to the naughty corner. I was NOT impressed. My daughter was obviously not very impressed either and refused to go to the toilet for about a month! When she did decide to try again it was slow going and she was not very interested for a long time.
Based on this experience I would advise to always stick to the patient and caring method, even if the floor is covered in excrement! As irritated as I got at times I always put a smile on my face and said “Oopsie, we’ve had an accident. Let’s sit on the toilet and then clean up the mess”. It was most definitely not easy to keep this up at all times but it paid off.
I found the hardest part (besides staying patient) was to keep reminding her to go to the toilet. She would normally just go if she needed to. The tricky times was when she was playing and would get very focused on what she was doing. If I reminded her to go she would just say she didn’t need to and 2 minutes later have an accident.
I learnt that certain things, like playing with the ipad, had to have a “toilet first” rule. At one time she got so engrossed with the ipad she had made a wee on the couch and was just sitting in it and playing on the ipad. When I told her she must go to the toilet because she has made a wee she said “No I didn’t wee”. Umm ok, you’re swimming in it! It was frustrating to make toilet trips the first and last (and middle) focus of everything we did.
Throughout the last year I have noticed that we made progress for a while, then seemed to not move forward, then moved backwards a little, then forwards then pause. It was not a steady progression from nappies to toilet.
The other setback we hit was that the day care told me she point blank refused to use their toilet, which I found very confusing. I tried to take her myself on a few occasions and she refused. The teacher suggested I bring her potty which I thought wouldn’t work because she only wanted the toilet at home at that stage. I brought the potty and she used it at day care and within a week she was using their toilet. I suppose she wanted something familiar and her own?
She was just moved to the bigger class at the beginning of August and only 2 weeks later did I realise that she wasn’t going through any nappies at school. My assumption was that she wasn’t having a nap. I spoke to the teacher and she looked at me surprised and told me she hasn’t been sleeping in a nappy for nap time. I was so surprised that I said “Ummm oh, she is coming home in the same pants?” The teacher told me that she had not been wearing diapers for nap times for 2 weeks and that there was not one accident. Seems my daughter is surprising me constantly.
She has the odd accident (usually ipad related) but on the whole she is managing just fine. Now we just have to decide when to take away the night time nappy!
How did you find potty training your kids?
My daughter NEVER wanted to use the little kids pottie. She always wanted to climb up onto the big toilet, which was quite an ordeal for a two year old.
And yet this is what she wanted. So I let her have at it. And, that worked a lot better than pressuring her to do otherwise.
Eventually she got the hang of day time and night time potty training and it all worked out.
My daughter also wanted to use the toilet from early on! We got a baby toilet seat which fitted over the big seat. Worked really well. I bought that from the Crazy Store for anyone looking for one 🙂
My son is doing the exact same thing and although I try most of the time to follow his lead, I feel like I do get frowned upon cause most of his peers are potty trained already, at school he is fully trained but at home he forgets or just doesn’t want to go, I have pulled my hair out so many times that its surprising I have any left.
I try to not let it bother ne but it kind of hard when random people want to tell you how to train your child but yet they don’t know his personality or that he hasto have areason for everything he does. i am at the point where I have given up trying and just let him decide when he wants to go
Hi Alley
This post was written over a year ago. Time honestly goes so fast and they do learn quickly. They just don’t learn in a straight line, it is up and down. It can be frustrating. Stop worrying about what other people think about your parenting styles, this is something that will happen constantly. People love hand out tips and advice on my child, thinking they know better. There is no-one that knows MY child better then me 🙂
From what I have experience so far I think the best thing to do is exactly what you have done. Stop trying so hard and leave your child to make the decision on when to use the toilet.
I have been getting frustrated now with my daughter’s night time nappy, most of her peers are off the nappy at night and it bothered me. I asked the advice of someone I trust and admire. She said eventually she will be off the night nappy, I mean it has to happen sometime right? And she is so right isn’t she?
It’s not really that important now is it?
My son was happy to see his small potty ,when momy is going to do number 1or2 he always accompany me and do what am doing.
Ill be still getting to the potty training with my son…and with your other post on potty trianing will help alot and i saw those cool potties yoi addd on the post that will make potty training fun and make them excited to use it.