Before we share our tips for handling toddler tantrums correctly, it is better to understand why they are happening in the first place. If you have a toddler chances are high that your toddler is having multiple melt downs every single day.
Why Do Toddlers Have Tantrums?
Temper tantrums are a normal occurrence in kids between the ages of one and three and usually involve screaming, kicking, breath holding, and hitting. Some children may have tantrums frequently while others may have them only every now and again. Tantrums are nothing out of the ordinary and is a part of a child’s development. Tantrums are how kids let you know they are feeling frustrated or upset.
Tantrums usually occur when kids feel uncomfortable, tired, or hungry. Many kids have a meltdown when they cannot get something they want for instance, a parent, or a toy. Learning how to handle frustration is a skill that kids develop over time. Tantrum often happen during the age of two and that is why many parents are familiar with the term “terrible two’s”.
This is because kids start learning language skills during their second year. Since they cannot express what they feel, want, or need, they become frustrated which usually leads to a tantrum. As their language skills start improving, these tantrums start to decrease.
7 Tips For Handling Toddler Tantrums
- Never lose your cool when you are reacting to a tantrum. You will only end up escalating the issue when you get angry or frustrated. Remind yourself that you are the parent and must help them with learning how to calm down. To do so, you have to be calm yourself.
- Tantrums are usually dealt with differently, contingent on the reason for your child’s frustration. Sometimes it is necessary to offer comfort when he is hungry or tired. You can help them calm down by offering a snack or taking them to lie down for a nap. Other times the best way to handle an outburst is to ignore it and distract him with another activity.
- If the reason for the tantrum is to get attention from you, the best way to handle it is by ignoring it. If it happens because you have refused him something, you need to remain calm and explain why you are saying no. Start doing another activity to get him to focus on something else.
- If he is throwing a tantrum because you asked him to do something and he refuses, its best to ignore the tantrum but stand your ground. Once he is calm, ask him again to do the task.
- If your toddler is throwing a tantrum in a public place and the danger exist of hurting others or himself, take him to a safe, quite place to calm down.
- If he persists with forbidden behavior after you asked him to stop, try using time-out or hold him firmly for a few minutes. Do not give in when the tantrum involves safety issues.
- Older children and pre-schoolers often use tantrums to get their way, especially if they realized that it works. School age kids can be sent to their rooms to calm down and its best to not pay too much attention to their behavior. Tell them to remain in their room until they feel better and have regained control. This can be incredibly effective since they can impact the outcome through their own actions, thus gaining a sense of control that they have lost during the.
Tantrums can be very unpleasant and sometimes embarrassing, but it is important stand your ground. If you give in, it will only prove to him that his tantrum was effective and that he can use it to his advantage for getting his way.