Kaboutjie SA Mommy Blogs by Lynne Huysamen
Nobody that gets married plans on getting a divorce but the same truth is that about half of all marriages land up in divorce rather than the hoped for happily ever after. The process of getting divorced can be very stressful, especially if there are children involved and the divorce is not amicable.
Contested vs Uncontested Divorce
An uncontested divorce is when you and your soon to be ex-spouse agree on everything from how finances and assets will be split, as well as child maintenance and custody details. When the divorce uncontested it is cheaper and better for all parties involved.
In a contested divorce parties do not agree with how things will be split in the divorce. When the divorce is contested it can become a lengthy process that is costly and it can be distressing for all parties involved, including the children.
In an uncontested divorce it can be as simple applying online, however depending on the area where you live you may need to get a lawyer, such as this Huntsville AL divorce attorney.
Parenting Plan Agreement
If you have children you will need to have a signed parenting plan before your divorce can be finalized. This parenting plan may go by different names depending on where in the world you live but the basic concept is the same.
Parents must agree on who has custody of the children and visitation rights of the other parent. It will involve how school holidays, birthdays, Christmas, Thanksgiving and other important dates are worked out between parents. It will also specify how much child maintenance the main care giver will receive from the other parent.
You may want to get a counsellor involved to help you and your ex work out these agreements in a fair and calm way, as well as to assist you, your ex and your children to cope during this transition.
Create An Inventory
In case things get ugly make sure that you have an inventory of every asset and household item. Take photos of all the items and include the day’s paper showing the date.
Value each item and take note of where everything is. Keep all of this information in a safe place.
Make Sure To Have A Copy Of Your Pre-nuptial Agreement
If you have a pre-nuptial agreement make sure that you know where it is and make a copy to keep in a safe place in case you need it. You need to do this as soon as you make the decision to file for divorce or as soon as you become aware that your spouse wants a divorce.
Look At The Future
Yes you may have been very badly hurt and you may be full of resentments and anger. However you have made a decision to leave your spouse and start fresh. Try to keep your mindset focused on moving forward rather than stuck on the negativity of the past.
Make your goal to move on with your life as quickly, smoothly and painlessly as possible. Try to come to an agreement rather than fighting to win. Having a drawn out, expensive court case is not going to do anyone any favours. Try to be the bigger person even if your ex is not capable of doing that.
