Reading Confessions of a Bad Mother by Stephanie Calman had me laughing out loud.
An honest account of how it really is to be a mother. Yes I’ve read all the baby manuals and how to be a great parent and bring up my child in the best possible way… but do these books really tell you how it is?
I am not one of those perfectly groomed mothers, I don’t wear make up every day and high heels. I just sort of get by as best as I can with what I have (usually unwashed hair and sleep still in my eyes). I try and be consistent with my kids, except when I am tired of course and then anything goes as long as I can get through the day.
While reading this book I felt Stephanie Calman wrote it specially for me.
If you love reading and you are a mom, you are sure to enjoy this book.
I felt exactly the same when I had my first baby: terrified and wondering whether I would be able to do it. On my daughter’s first birthday it was more a celebration for me, an accomplishment. I had managed to keep another being firstly alive, but also well cared for. I honestly didn’t think I would be able to do it.
Here is a wonderful excerpt from her book:
I should never have become a parent. It’s impossible. In the magazines, parenting looks like a cruise. When you get there, it’s a tiny rowing boat, in a storm. And some bastard’s not put in any oars.
I don’t do everything right, in fact I do a lot of things completely wrong.
Here are my top 5 Confessions of a Bad Mother:
- I feed my children chips, lots of them
Yes I am well aware of the fact they are filled with MSG and everything bad. They do however have some good points. The kids love them. If I take a trip with my kids one of the first things I pack are chips. I need them to get to our destination sane.
- I used biscuits to keep my son happy
My son (that was a surprise) was in the office with me from 2 weeks old until 1 year old. He loves biscuits and I used them to be able to get some work done. If he started complaining I gave him biscuits so I could squeeze in a little more work.
- I left my kids in the cot until they complained in the mornings
It is a long day with children and I make sure it starts as late as possible. Until my kids started moaning I left them in the cot to play. I still do that with my son. It means I might just manage to have a hot cup of coffee before work and get their bags packed for creche without them hanging on me.
- I let them watch tv
Yes a big time Bad Mother crime. If tv will get them to sit still and quiet for a little while I will do it!
- Boring lunchboxes
I pack the same thing for them for creche everyday. I just can’t seem to come up with anything original so they get a banana, a yoghurt, half a sandwich and a packet of chips. The flavour of the yoghurt and chips changes daily and the fillings in the sandwich also changes daily. See I make an effort!
- Sometimes I spank
I know I shouldn’t and I try my best but sometimes I lose my cool and I smack my 3 year old daughter on her bum. I am not the most patient person and my daughter has become cheeky and pushes boundaries all the time. I try all the Good methods like sending her to her room, withholding privileges and the naughty corner. These do no always work. On the few occasions when I have given her a smack she has been good as gold for a long time afterwards. I on the hand have suffered with guilt long after she has forgotten the incident.